But I don’t know how to fix it

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Hi. I’m a people-pleaser and it absolutely sucks.

Being a people-pleaser is like walking on a tightrope in every social situation. You’re just balancing on other people’s needs and expectations, all the while trying to swallow your own. You say yes to everyone but yourself. You smile and you shut up.

I wish I weren’t constantly managing everyone else’s feelings, but I am. And I’m ready to talk about why this whole persona sucks so freaking much.

I am dead-*ss tired of putting other’s ideas and comfort above my own.

When you’re a people-pleaser, you are more than happy to abandon your own wants and needs for the sake of others. …

Believe me, I am just as surprised as you.

Photo by Diana Polekhina on Unsplash

It started out with a simple question to my dermatologist.

“Can you tell me a little about Botox?”

Next thing I knew, she was doing a whole consultation on my face and recommending a certain amount of units on my forehead and pricing it out for me. I decided to take the plunge and I’m really glad I did.

I have been thinking about Botox for a while now.

I’m at an age where I know a lot of women who are dipping into these injections. (And yes, these are super privileged women. …

It finally happened… now what?

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It’s official: I’m engaged.

For those of you keeping up with my personal articles, you know that I have been ready for this day for a long time.

You’ll know that my boyfriend (now fiance) was hesitant to move in with me last year. You’ll know I was scared to get engaged during a pandemic. And you’ll know that I had a lot of questions about married sex.

And now? It’s here. I’m engaged. And there’s a list of things I wish I had known before now.

I’m deliriously happy. I’m also somewhat overwhelmed. I’m also stressed and exhausted and…

Please, please, give us all a shot. (Pun Intended.)

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I can’t believe we are halfway through 2021. While 2020 dragged on, this year is blazing forward. And now, with the delta surge hitting the U.S., it feels like we are back in 2020 all over again.

I am really f*cking frustrated.

Last year, I prayed every day for a vaccine. Like so many people, I was terrified for my loved ones. My dad has a serious health condition and my sister was in the frontlines as a doctor.

When the vaccine was approved, I cried in relief.

There was finally hope of an end in sight. There was finally a chance to be normal again. To be able to eat in a restaurant…

Hint: my disorder is not as secretive as I thought it was.

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I got a text from my mom during work asking if she could “stop by” and that she had “something to talk about.” We talk all the time, so I know what this statement really meant.

I was in for a lecture of some sort. I just had no idea what kind.

It begins with a family photo where I look larger than the rest of them.

If I am being honest, I know my eating disorder has reared its ugly head this year. I feel it in the tightening of my clothes. I see it in the widening of my face.

Days before my intervention, my family and I had gone to brunch. We…

I didn’t expect this to hurt so much.

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I’m having a hard time getting up the nerve to write this story.

I told myself to maybe wait a day or two when I’m feeling less raw and vulnerable, but honestly, I can’t hold these emotions by myself for one more minute.

My dog died today and I’m devastated.

Fair warning, this post is going to be sad, so if you couldn’t handle Marley & Me, then you may want to skip this one.

Rex was thirteen years old. He was our family dog and has been in our family for nearly half of my life. He was a golden retriever who didn’t like his paws…

I wish I never had to wear heels again, TBH.

Photo by Humphrey Muleba on Unsplash

For those of us heading back into the workplace — and those of us who never left — it’s time to face how messed up the office is for women.

Many companies are giving in to the flexible work environment and letting their people stay home. Todd Brison wrote a great article on why we should stay working from home. And I for one am all for it.

Women in particular really benefit from a virtual environment. In a company-wide survey at my company, women were in the majority of workers who were “thriving” in the work from home life.

And I don’t plan on stopping anytime soon.

Photo by Étienne Beauregard-Riverin on Unsplash

I’m about to change your sex life, maybe forever.

Yes, that’s right. Allow me to introduce you to a sex tip that’s been changing the game for me: basically, having sex every morning. It’s a game-changer.

For background, I am the one in the relationship who wants sex more.

Here are a few articles for reference:

Being the one who wants sex more can really f*cking suck.

You feel crazy. You feel needy. You start to doubt everything about yourself. I’ve tried everything:

  • I played hard to get.
  • I waited for him to initiate.
  • I planned…

And I am not going to apologize for it, either

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I never thought I’d say it, but I am wearing scrunchies now. I am in my thirties and I am pulling my hair back with fabric a la 90s style. I swore I’d never do it, but here I am.

Blame it on the pandemic. Blame it on working from home. Blame it on the fact that I just literally do not care anymore.

I am over the “rules” of what is “age-appropriate.”

In fact, let’s burn the whole damn rulebook.

If you’re like me, you are way too concerned about what other people think. It is not something that I am super proud of, but it’s the truth…

I have not thought about this in years.

Photo by Matthias Heyde on Unsplash

trigger warning: description of sexual assault

I don’t remember how old I was, but I was young enough that I still went to the doctor’s office with my mother. She had taken me out of school to make the appointment.

I had an ear infection. Or maybe a sinus infection.

Whatever it was, I know I was going to see the Ear, Nose, and Throat Doctor. I remember waiting a long time. Maybe an hour.

The lights were bright white and fluorescent and the waiting room chairs were uncomfortable. …

Gigi Love

I have questions (and answers) about sex, love, and pop culture. You too? Join me here: https://gigilove.substack.com

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